COWABUNGA!

As seen on such auspicious occasions as 'last Saturday night', may I present one of my favourite t-shirts ever:

I RECLAIM THE SLEEVELESS TEE FROM THE REALMS OF MENSWEAR!!! Not for me are the paltry cut-off offerings which are the standard fare in ladies' rock fashion, these babies (or 'arm-holes') go all the way to the bottom of my ribs! AND WHO DOESN'T LOVE RIBS!?!

I love this t-shirt. It's faded and worn out but the cow skull is only made more awesome by it's ghostliness, an apparition staring out from the murky nether-kingdoms of washed-out cotton. All you can make out form a distance is the metallic sheen of the horns.

The urge to learn archery and cattle-rustlin' and to dance around a totem pole of some sort almost overcomes me whenever I wear this, So far, I have mastered it.


So far. 

Not idly do the tees of Lorien fall

Understatement of the eon it may be, nevertheless it bears mentioning that I have a rather soft spot for the Lord of the Rings and it's many permutations. Let's see, we have:

The books: epic, engrossing, very, very long. I read at about 40,000 WPM and they took me a month to get through, despite my penchant for all things hobbity. However, this is not to say I didn't enjoy them; they are probably my biggest influence when it comes to writing my own (albeit, awful) stories.

The films: Epic, obviously. And full of hot dudes with swords. By which I mean the utter scope and the attention to detail, the minutiae of costuming and lore; it was a mammoth task to convert such an iconic series of novels into moving pictures, and one that I think the makers and producers and actors did a rather bang-up job of, verily!

The t-shirt: I think my reaction was 'ASDFGHJKLKJHGFDSDFGHJKLJHYTRE!"£'

I don't know about you, but when I think of LotR and Masonic imagery I get rather excited (yeah, okay so the Masonic stuff reminds me of National Treasure. And my excuses for that being an adult thing to say are twofold: Sean Bean and Nicholas Cage.) I digress, I digress. Why don't we just let the garment speak for itself?

 

The intricacy of the elvish script! Yes I'm a huge nerd!

Look! A tiny Frodo and Samwise! Again, though this blog was not originally intended to be a constant promotional tool, this shirt was purchased in a flurry of mis-typed credit card info and hyperventilation from threadless. I promise, my next entry will attempt to diversify slightly, but they really are an amazing store.

I wear this with dark grey skinnies, leather jacket, cons and an attitude. Broadsword optional.

(I would normally apologise for the awful title pun but I'm actually quite proud of it.)

THE CAT FROM OUTER SPACE

You know, when I wrote the last entry I thought to myself, HELL THAT'S A PRETTY UNIQUE T-SHIRT. However, going through my gargantuan collection I gaped in astonishment as I pulled this from the detritus for I apparently own two cat/purple/space themed t-shirts. This is madness; THIS IS SPACE CAT.

If you were composed entirely of purple nebulae I'm sure you'd be peeved too. I love space and I love cats, so there was really no question over the purchase of this fine fettered fashion item from the fine folks at threadless. Oooh, just look at those colours/that alliteration!

Sad to say I don't wear this as often as I should, because there's something about black t-shirts that I just don't dig, man. I should probably also say right now that I do have a rather large percentage of cat-related t-shirts in my collection, so prepare yourself...BUT WE ALL LIKE CATS, DON'T WE? MEOW!

NIGHT LIONS

Let's get this party started shall we?!

Beyond time, beyond space...a t-shirt was envisioned by forces as yet unimaginable to mere mortals such as we. One can only stand back and behold the majesty of the DEATH KITTEN STARGAZING LIGHTNING-STRIKE KEYBOARD T-SHIRT.

This is it, the day has come; cotton has reached a new plateau in worthiness, for it has been chosen to portray an image nigh beyond description (or at least, beyond a better description than DEATH KITTEN STARGAZING LIGHTNING-STRIKE KEYBOARD T-SHIRT)

After long weeks and many miles, through trials and hardships unthinkably arduous, I finally, finally, managed to regather my wits and hand over the £4 at the charity shop so that I could call myself the posessor of this t-shirt of t-shirts. Though can such bodaciousness be truly owned, dude?

The question remains; WHAT FOOL CAST THIS OUT?

WE MEW AND WORLDS COLLIDE. A PURR AND THE STARS GO OUT. DO NOT STAND IN OUR WAY. WE ARE THE NIGHT LIONS.